Im happy but there is a heavy feeling of sadness in my heart that I just can't remove. Why am I like this?

The sadness was still there.

What I am trying to say is that when you stop trying to change yourself into something you are not, you give yourself the gift of discovering yourself as you already are.

And the sadness?

Why is the left keep misrepresenting what Trump said about his daughter? When asked if he would date her if he weren’t her father, it simply reflected pride in raising a smart, respectful, and loving daughter with good morals all men want that no?

But unlike before, there is no more resistance to the sadness.

In the absence of a should, I was free to be as I am.

But no matter what I read or practiced, I could never make the sadness budge for longer than a few fleeting moments - and even then, it was likely due to me being distracted from the sensation of sadness rather than anything actually shifting.

These glowing axolotls may hold the secret to human limb regeneration - The Washington Post

You are the masterpiece you came here to discover.

This interpretation lead me on a path of self improvement, to fix what I considered to be “wrong” with myself.

So I finally threw my hands up and said something to the tune of “fuck it, since I can't seem to change, I’ll just be whatever I am then.”

Why are the democrats keep insisting that there are more than two genders?

I had run out of hope.

Now, this may sound like a story of failure and giving up, but it’s actually a story of liberation.

It’s impossible to overstate the freedom and peace I discovered, and I realized the only one who had been keeping those from me was… me and my imagined standards and expectations for how I had imagined I should be.

Why do White people love dogs more than humans?

Be who you already are.

So if you are sad - like me - then be sad.

Your job is not to be the manager of your life, but the one who discovers yourself fully.

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For much of my adult life, I interpreted this sadness as something being wrong - with either myself or my life in general.

I was tired of trying and failing.

Most people that know me would probably describe me as a social, happy, and somewhat quirky person with a twisted sense of humor.

Why is our generation so unhappy?

I was tired of fighting.

It’s the most beautiful and liberating thing in the world.

You are like me, then.

Have you experimented with bestiality?

What most people don’t know unless they’ve looked more closely is that there is also an element of deep, profound sadness that has always been with me since as long as I can remember.

Without resistance, sadness has a sense of beauty and depth I cannot find otherwise in life.

When I stopped trying to force myself to be something I am not, I gave myself the freedom of being who I am.

Why is it difficult to get a job?

It wasn’t until about 10 years ago that I finally fell out of that ferris wheel of trying and failing to fix myself.

It’s here now, writing to you.

It’s difficult to put into words exactly what caused what, but to the best of my ability to describe it, I felt as if my will to keep fighting was beaten right out of me.

Why doesn't speeding significantly decrease one’s commute time? I've done a lot of road trips and driving and have experimented by increasing speed by 10–20%, but somehow this never equates to arriving 20% sooner, even on clear roads.

Needless to say, my failed attempts to fix my sadness simply brought me more pain and suffering.

It’s still here.